"Satanic Panic" Pastor BOB LARSON Thinks JOHNNY DEPP Is Possessed By Pirate Demons

Admin

May 9

Everyone's favorite anti-metal Christian kook, Pastor Bob Larson—notorious for fueling the Satanic hysteria surrounding heavy metal in the 80s—thinks Johnny Depp's recent behavior has been spurred on by "pirate demons."

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"There are such things as Real pirate demons," says Larson. "I don't see the much in the mainland U.S., but when I'm in a coastal city, or when ministering in the Caribbean, I see lots of pirate demons and I've encountered them, and I cast them out. So, this whole Jack Sparrow role? There's a bit of truth to that, and I wonder: Did Depp get actual pirate demons from playing his Jack Sparrow role?"

The Pirates of the Caribbean star and his ex-wife Amber Heard have been battling in court for years, filing defamation suits against each other as awful details of their marriage became public. Both have accused the other of violence, addiction, and tarnishing the reputations of their respective careers.

As for Pastor Bob—the evangelist, self-proclaimed exorcist, and pastor of the Spiritual Freedom Church in Phoenix—he remains metal's most defiant nemesis. Convinced that metal music was "the common thread in mixed up kids," Larson played a huge part in the "Satanic Panic" of the 1980s, and in 1992, he produced a PSA (see below) with several Christian metal acts because, as Larson put it, "It's also obvious that metal music and it's lyrics makes things worse or makes it better." Meant to address "Satanism, loneliness, and lack of faith," the clip is pure 80s/90s sensationalist hysteria with the intent of making things "better," we assume, but likely just caused more panic and prejudice throughout the entire world.

Depp and Heard clearly are in need of better days, but it's doubtful that an exorcism courtesy of Pastor Bob Larson to rid Depp of the pirate demons that are obviously pillaging his soul will be of much help.

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