A 𝒎𝒖𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒓𝒂 I could do without

By Trivia - The Spice of Life on August 3, 2024

Posted on Trivia - The Spice of Life on 03/08/2024

There is a list of idioms or muhaavre (मुहावरे) in Hindi which everyone learns in school. The other day, I heard my daughter reading them and memorizing their meanings. I realized that the list has not changed much since my school days. When she came to the muhavra - चूड़ियाँ पहनना or wearing bangles - which signifies being chicken-hearted (or कायर होना as one would say in Hindi), I was rather disgusted. This idiom has always left a bad taste in my mouth. It is as though those who wear bangles - i.e. women - are cowardly.

Unfortunately, this is not just an idiom that is learnt and forgotten. I have heard it being used quite often in daily conversations and political speeches. The idiom is somehow very disparaging. I wonder why one cannot be brave if one wears bangles or why bangles are a sign of weakness! The same sentiment of asking a man who is purportedly meek to wear bangles is echoed in our film songs. The song from Desh Premee (1982) Jao ji jao does exactly that! What is worse is that it a woman telling the man to wear bangles and get a ghagra stitched as he is not man enough.

Jaate ho to jaao, par itna sun lo
thodi choodiyan pahanlo...

Bangles whether made of glass or metal are beautiful and only enhance the beauty of any woman, who wears them. Bangles also hold a special place in Indian culture. While glass bangles are delicate and need to be handled with care, they provide one the luxury of choosing the perfect colour to go with an occasion or with the attire. Gold bangles of course are monochromatic but look gorgeous on the forearm. By no means can wearing bangles, which are an adornment, be equated with timidity. It is in fact a pity that men do not or cannot or choose not to wear them. But one aspect about wearing bangles that irks me is that of associating it only with being suhaagan thereby discriminating against widows. It is high time we got over such retrograde beliefs. It is heartening to note that initiatives to do away with such regressive and inhuman customs have gathered momentum.

It is perhaps time to do away with such idioms which are biased, regressive and unflattering, irrespective of whether they mock men or women. The best way of doing away with the idiom is by not using it in both spoken and written language.

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